Today was my very 1st 5K! I knew going into this I had hit an all new insanity level. What was I thinking? I've never done anything like this before. Much less, I can't run. My feet don't move like others due to the surgeries but most of all because I babied them for the last 5-6 years and haven't challenged myself to move them because I've always been scared of injuring them. I decided a month ago babying them was over and well they got a rude awakening this morning. Not that I haven't tortured them with my workouts but today I made them show up ;-)
I can't even begin to describe the emotions that went into this. Barely into the race and I was the last one. I kept thinking I can't do this! I'm being freakin' ridiculous to even attempt this. Just get me to the next street and I'll stop this madness. After all, the cop following me had to be irritated by now that I was so far behind everyone else. So as I got to the 1 mile point I thought okay, I'm a third of a way, just stop. Nobody should be mad at me at least I tried.
Then out of nowhere the female cop following me in her police car got on her speaker and said "You got this". She pulled up beside and gave me some pointers (see, I had no idea keep your arms elevated and bent and moving and the swelling that was happening in my hands would go down). So I trekked on.
I finally saw the halfway point and I thought again I was done and that was it. Again, the female cop pulled up and said she wasn't going to let me quit. We chatted as I walked (we know each other due to she's had to respond to calls at my place of work but she didn't realize it until I told her but said she knew I looked familiar). I was finally feeling like I could do this. I wasn't sure how but I finally reached inside myself for that determination that is making me achieve my goals. The cop asked me what was motivating me and I told her I was tired of sitting on the sidelines when someone asks me to do something and having to say no because I can't keep up. I don't know how she knew to ask all the right questions to keep me going but she did.
If I gave up now, what else was I going to give up on? Just because something is hard was I going to continue to give up as I have in the past? So, I kept on going with my arms up and moving. I finally saw one of my CF folks at one of the check points and she encouraged me. I kept going.
At this time I had 1 cop in front of me and 1 behind me. The one in front of me blasted some tunes for me (that was just cool) and then the one behind me was the female cop kept telling me to keep going. She then told me some of my CF family were coming to join me. I hadn't seen them at this point. Finally, I saw the girls walking towards me and she was right they were coming to go the rest of the way with me. I've just never been around such supportive people. So encouraging! Then here comes my coworker, Wayne. I had already told him he'd probably have to come find me and he did. He's used to being around all of us girls at work so here he was surrounded by a bunch of new girls.
So everyone at this point was chatting and I'm just focusing on getting thru this. I really thought I would never see the finish line (that place where it all began). One of my trainers was in the group who came to finish this with me. She's an awesome trainer and she told me when we got around the last curve we were going to jog in. I didn't think I could do it but she told me we wouldn't go any faster but just pick the legs up a little more. By this time I saw a bunch of people heading to the finish line to cheer me on.
So here we go around the bend so to speak. Guess what? I DID IT!!!
I remember seeing cameras and thinking, really folks you just don't know how much I hate having my picture taken. I saw my other trainer and think he handed me some water and I just hugged him but I almost literally fell to the ground because my legs were like jello at this point. I hugged a bunch of other folks, some were my CF family and just everyone else. I made sure I thanked the cop that encouraged me along the way. She was not going to give up on me and let me give up on myself. Which is also the attitude my CF family has. They aren't giving up on me and they won't let me give up on myself. I'm not sure if my CF trainers knew what they were in store for the day I wandered in to CF but they do seem up for the challenge.
So with all the emotions that went from embarrassment, humiliating, determined, who cares what others think, energized and finally PROUD of my accomplishment. Next year, I'll be keeping up with everyone else and be the one to go back and help bring the last place person to the finish line!
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Friday, March 29, 2013
Decisions...
This week has been tough, both physically and mentally. Who knew being on vacation would take such a toll. While juggling Passover Seders, working out and just basic day to day stuff my nutrition lacked. Although, I have really tried to stay on track. And who would've thought not working out for 4 days would have such an impact...
So I've been tossing around in my head for a week or so about increasing the workouts from 3 to 4 (and if I get adventurous 5) days a week. I inquired with one of the trainers and was told it was up to me but I would see more improvement increasing the workouts. So, today I forked over the money for another month. After all, it's pay day better give that check now rather than later - LOL!
See, I really want to achieve all my goals and dreams and not have to say NO when someone asks me to do something because I'm not in shape or I can't keep up. I want to be able to say to YES let's go and do it!
The workouts yesterday and today were more than hard! They definitely challenged and pushed me. Yesterday's workout worked the entire body. Today's workout worked my arms. But the other thing today's did was challenge me on my fear of heights. I know that box is probably only about 2 feet tall but it's the scariest 2 feet in the world to me. It is such a mental challenge for me and at one point I just wanted to cry and had to tell myself I can do this and not let it get to me. I have to tune everyone out. For most people this would be nothing and so simple but for me it's just so hard to get up that high. It might as well be 50 stories high. And yes, I noticed the taller box was snuck in on me today. I didn't complain although I'm sure I gave some evil looks well maybe I did complain - LOL!
So while today I think I made good choices and decisions regarding this CrossFit the fear of the unknown still lingers in my mind and causes me doubts. But I'm going to have faith that I'm doing the right thing. It's just hard when you run up against someone who says "oh you're doing that" or "oh you're one of those". My guess is CrossFit doesn't have a good reputation among some folks but when I do hear the negativity it's always folks complaining that they know someone and it changed them and they were always doing CrossFit. Well, it does change you and I've seen it in myself. I actually see where I have some confidence I didn't have before. Even if I don't see the physical changes such as the weight loss or getting better at the workouts I know mentally it has made me more positive and more eager to achieve my goals. I just have to give myself time. Personally, I think everyone should find what works for them. For some like me, it's CrossFit, others it's a traditional gym, yoga, being on a treadmill or elliptical. If it works for someone then do it. We're all different so we're all going to like different things. This just happens to be what is working or hopefully working for me right now in my life.
So I've been tossing around in my head for a week or so about increasing the workouts from 3 to 4 (and if I get adventurous 5) days a week. I inquired with one of the trainers and was told it was up to me but I would see more improvement increasing the workouts. So, today I forked over the money for another month. After all, it's pay day better give that check now rather than later - LOL!
See, I really want to achieve all my goals and dreams and not have to say NO when someone asks me to do something because I'm not in shape or I can't keep up. I want to be able to say to YES let's go and do it!
The workouts yesterday and today were more than hard! They definitely challenged and pushed me. Yesterday's workout worked the entire body. Today's workout worked my arms. But the other thing today's did was challenge me on my fear of heights. I know that box is probably only about 2 feet tall but it's the scariest 2 feet in the world to me. It is such a mental challenge for me and at one point I just wanted to cry and had to tell myself I can do this and not let it get to me. I have to tune everyone out. For most people this would be nothing and so simple but for me it's just so hard to get up that high. It might as well be 50 stories high. And yes, I noticed the taller box was snuck in on me today. I didn't complain although I'm sure I gave some evil looks well maybe I did complain - LOL!
So while today I think I made good choices and decisions regarding this CrossFit the fear of the unknown still lingers in my mind and causes me doubts. But I'm going to have faith that I'm doing the right thing. It's just hard when you run up against someone who says "oh you're doing that" or "oh you're one of those". My guess is CrossFit doesn't have a good reputation among some folks but when I do hear the negativity it's always folks complaining that they know someone and it changed them and they were always doing CrossFit. Well, it does change you and I've seen it in myself. I actually see where I have some confidence I didn't have before. Even if I don't see the physical changes such as the weight loss or getting better at the workouts I know mentally it has made me more positive and more eager to achieve my goals. I just have to give myself time. Personally, I think everyone should find what works for them. For some like me, it's CrossFit, others it's a traditional gym, yoga, being on a treadmill or elliptical. If it works for someone then do it. We're all different so we're all going to like different things. This just happens to be what is working or hopefully working for me right now in my life.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
The Journey Begins...
So after almost a month of working out 3 times a week here I am looking to doing this again for another month. Well, I told the trainers I would give them until my birthday to show me this works. When I first signed up I had to take 3 classes that were 1 on 1 with the trainers. I was really surprised and impressed at how much info was put into these sessions. I got to know both trainers a little bit and they got to know me.
I was shown how to do some of the exercises in 1 session and as helpful as this was it was a little overwhelming trying to get it all in my head.
The 2nd session was a nutrition session. It was probably the most helpful of all the sessions. While most of it is common sense there were things I learned about my eating habits that I had not stopped and taken the time to realize such as I hate protein with the exception of cheese. See, I'm not big on eating meat in fact I get tired of chewing that stuff. And as much as I love my veggies I couldn't eat all that were on the plan. I don't dislike fruit but I hate to buy it and have to cut it up so I buy it already cut up. Then there was the dreaded weigh in. I have to say G-d intervened on this one because I don't get on a scale for anyone. Well, by this time I knew even if I didn't like what was being asked of me I was going to have to do it.
Thus began the nutrition part of this journey. As easy as it should have been to get on board with this it wasn't. I struggled for over a week to do 5 strict days of this plan with no sugar and no cheating. I finally got it! It's still a struggle especially when holidays come around but I'm trying and really working hard at sticking to it. I just don't like meat and that is my biggest struggle. But I believe I will be keeping the dairy farmers in business as I love milk and that is considered a carb and a protein ;-) So after 1 month the weight loss is around 11lbs. Do I wish it was more.... heck yeah! But it's a start and the start of my journey to do even better next month.
I was shown how to do some of the exercises in 1 session and as helpful as this was it was a little overwhelming trying to get it all in my head.
The 2nd session was a nutrition session. It was probably the most helpful of all the sessions. While most of it is common sense there were things I learned about my eating habits that I had not stopped and taken the time to realize such as I hate protein with the exception of cheese. See, I'm not big on eating meat in fact I get tired of chewing that stuff. And as much as I love my veggies I couldn't eat all that were on the plan. I don't dislike fruit but I hate to buy it and have to cut it up so I buy it already cut up. Then there was the dreaded weigh in. I have to say G-d intervened on this one because I don't get on a scale for anyone. Well, by this time I knew even if I didn't like what was being asked of me I was going to have to do it.
Thus began the nutrition part of this journey. As easy as it should have been to get on board with this it wasn't. I struggled for over a week to do 5 strict days of this plan with no sugar and no cheating. I finally got it! It's still a struggle especially when holidays come around but I'm trying and really working hard at sticking to it. I just don't like meat and that is my biggest struggle. But I believe I will be keeping the dairy farmers in business as I love milk and that is considered a carb and a protein ;-) So after 1 month the weight loss is around 11lbs. Do I wish it was more.... heck yeah! But it's a start and the start of my journey to do even better next month.
A New Adventure
I had been debating for a while about leaving the gym I belonged to and finding something else more challenging that would help me meet my goals. What I didn't know at the time was that the gym I belonged to was going to be closing its doors. But I was already researching and considering hiring a personal trainer. Well, for that to happen I needed to make sure I could afford to do so. What I didn't realize was that while I was considering this and having many chats with G-d he was helping by putting things in place for me and guiding me. I took the money that I was paying for the gym and I had another bill that I didn't realize was paid off. With that I had my start and the confidence to seek out the right fit for me. I was really dreading going back into a traditional gym.
Then I had been seeing a FB friend's postings and pictures about CrossFit and was always intrigued but yet said NO WAY I can do any of that. After a few months I finally got the courage to email her and inquire. The response I got was overwhelming and encouraging. Of course, I still drug my feet. Then out of nowhere here comes this CrossFit gym opening 5 minutes from my house and work. So at my friend's nudging I contacted this place and even popped in. I came back still debating if I could do it and would they want someone so out of shape to even be a part of this. After all, everyone else was in fit shape and were doing some amazing things.
I couldn't get the thoughts of all these dreams I have out of my head. I knew half the battle was going to be to lose the weight but the other half I needed to be in shape. See, I want to do things such as learn to ski, go hiking, even climb some mountains (now, I'm not talking climb Mt. Everest but something a little more challenging than Stone Mountain), zip lining and fly a plane. Those are just a few of my dreams.
I went to the open house they had (might I add terrified and expecting to be drop kicked out of there quicker than I arrived). I was challenged beyond belief. I couldn't do a darn thing. But I was determined. Well, I was determined until I was told to stand on a box probably about 3 -4 feet tall (might as well have been 100 feet tall). The more I said NO the more the trainer said YES! I was shocked! How dare this stranger tell me what I'm going to do - LOL! I don't take orders or listen to folks like that ;-) I stood on one box that led me to the taller box. All the while really just wanting to say a few choice things about the situation but I think (at least I hope I did) I kept those thoughts to myself. I got up there but it was scarier than anything I've done in a while. And the look on my face had to be priceless when he said he would catch me if I fell. I just wanted to say to him I'm really not in the mood to make his wife a widow! Thankfully, he let me down. Not sure if it was the fear on my face or if he just wasn't so sure about me even being there. Getting down was a challenge too, I hugged that pole so tight like a stripper sliding down. I was not letting go. I wanted to kiss the ground when I got off of there. But everyone was still so friendly and nice. I was looking around like REALLY??? I've never experienced this before.
So the next week I thought about it and talked with a few folks about joining. I finally decided to find out if I could join. I was told YES! So on March 1st I embarked on my newest journey called CrossFit!
Then I had been seeing a FB friend's postings and pictures about CrossFit and was always intrigued but yet said NO WAY I can do any of that. After a few months I finally got the courage to email her and inquire. The response I got was overwhelming and encouraging. Of course, I still drug my feet. Then out of nowhere here comes this CrossFit gym opening 5 minutes from my house and work. So at my friend's nudging I contacted this place and even popped in. I came back still debating if I could do it and would they want someone so out of shape to even be a part of this. After all, everyone else was in fit shape and were doing some amazing things.
I couldn't get the thoughts of all these dreams I have out of my head. I knew half the battle was going to be to lose the weight but the other half I needed to be in shape. See, I want to do things such as learn to ski, go hiking, even climb some mountains (now, I'm not talking climb Mt. Everest but something a little more challenging than Stone Mountain), zip lining and fly a plane. Those are just a few of my dreams.
I went to the open house they had (might I add terrified and expecting to be drop kicked out of there quicker than I arrived). I was challenged beyond belief. I couldn't do a darn thing. But I was determined. Well, I was determined until I was told to stand on a box probably about 3 -4 feet tall (might as well have been 100 feet tall). The more I said NO the more the trainer said YES! I was shocked! How dare this stranger tell me what I'm going to do - LOL! I don't take orders or listen to folks like that ;-) I stood on one box that led me to the taller box. All the while really just wanting to say a few choice things about the situation but I think (at least I hope I did) I kept those thoughts to myself. I got up there but it was scarier than anything I've done in a while. And the look on my face had to be priceless when he said he would catch me if I fell. I just wanted to say to him I'm really not in the mood to make his wife a widow! Thankfully, he let me down. Not sure if it was the fear on my face or if he just wasn't so sure about me even being there. Getting down was a challenge too, I hugged that pole so tight like a stripper sliding down. I was not letting go. I wanted to kiss the ground when I got off of there. But everyone was still so friendly and nice. I was looking around like REALLY??? I've never experienced this before.
So the next week I thought about it and talked with a few folks about joining. I finally decided to find out if I could join. I was told YES! So on March 1st I embarked on my newest journey called CrossFit!
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