Humpty Dumpty

I think I know how Humpty Dumpty felt when he fell off the wall and broke into a million little pieces and had to be put back together.  Difference is I'm the one left to put me back together.  That was one conversation I don't ever want to have again.  I feel like I've had to walk to the end of a plank and with the decision to sink or swim.  Curling up in a fetal position and crying is not an option.  I'm tired. 

I feel like hyperventilating when I think of writing my goals on that board.  And even more so when I think about answering any questions as to why I have specific goals.  I'm not there right now. 

I was nowhere near prepared for all these emotional tolls that come with this lifestyle change involving CrossFit.  Nothing has ever pushed me to my limits and beyond like this before.  I've always been the strong, independent, opinionated one that knew what direction to take.  I've always been the one to help someone else pick the pieces back up when they fell apart.  Now, being the one who needs help on the other side of that wall is scary as hell and I don't like it. 

 

Now to take lots of deep breaths and decide what I want to do...

 

Time to remember why I walked through those CrossFit doors to begin with and pull from that determination to make this lifestyle change. 

 

Time to swim through this and come out on the other side by hitting the finish line. 

 

Curling up in that fetal position will get me nowhere. 

 

Time for the pieces of this puzzle to be put back together and focus on the goal.